The Feed

Tomboys, Brian Urlacher's Baby Mama and Hank Aaron Need Love Too

You know the scrappy tomboy character in sports movies who likes football or hockey or whatever more than they like dolls and frilly things? There's a good chance she'll end up as a doll who looks pretty hot in frilly things. (Winning the Turnover Battle)

Mel Ott was a lot more than just a good crossword puzzle answer. (Faith and Fear in Flushing)

Brian Urlacher treats the ladies with respect. (Kissing Suzy Kolber)

Baseball rookies at the break. We dig Ryan Braun and so should you. (The Extrapolater)

Some projections for the second half in the American League. (Vegas Watch)

Stop the presses! Darius Miles did something that helped the world. Was that a pig that just flew by?(The Fanhouse)

There might not be many of their people there but even the Chinese are begging Yi Jianlian to go to Milwaukee already. (The Postmen)

What do you have to do to get fired from Fox? If you're Bill Maas it takes a carload of weed, ectasy and coke. Swell mugshot, though. (Awful Announcing)

Roger Federer has the forehand of Thor, the backhand of a carnival strongman but he puts on his pants backwards just like the rest of us. (SportsbyBrooks)

Bud Selig chooses Barry and somewhere Hank Aaron's heart is a-breaking. (Rumors and Rants)...unless he doesn't. Henry, I just can't quit you! (ESPN)

Get 'Em While They're Young

Some big names are getting their knickers in a twist about a report out of Las Vegas linking them to a prostitution ring. Esperanza Brooks, an accused madam, was recorded dropping the names Bill Clinton and Shaquille O'Neal as satisfied clients by the LVPD during an undercover investigation. A Vegas vice cop said Brooks "sold herself as being involved in high-end prostitution, which means the girls are very top-notch - dealt with celebrities." Her involvement with celebrities didn't stop at allegedly selling them sex and drugs, however.

Brooks, arrested with four other women, worked by day as a cheerleading coach at the Andre Agassi College Prep Academy, a public charter school the tennis ace founded in 2001 in the ghetto section of Vegas.

Everyone agrees that helping the younger generation get a leg up in the world is a noble effort. Getting both legs up and pinned behind their ears seems like the kind of education you could get in any public school, though.

The Sad Tale Of The 1994 Expos, Robert Horry's Smoking Crack and The Mustache Ride Is Closed

The 1994 Expos go right alongside whoever would have been the best team in the 2004-05 NHL. Wouldn't it be funny if it was the Canadiens? (Milk Was A Bad Choice)

Robert Horry's challenging the Celtics and the Lakers of the 80's. While they'd probably lose, either one of those teams would put up more of a fight, right now, than the Cavs. In their primes? Horry might have gotten some screws knocked loose when he ran into Steve Nash. (Larry Brown Sports)

Unlike Tony Soprano, we know just what happened to Sal Fasano. It may be time to stop believing. (The 700 Level)

This proves you don't need legs to come up with asinine excuses for failing drug tests. Unless it's true, in which case it proves there are some seriously fucked up people in the world. (WBRS Sports Blog)

Juwan Howard traded for Mike James. That sound you hear is absolute nothingness. (Hoops And Other Pop Culture)

The Fort Myers Miracle have a crack marketing staff but something tells me Billy Donovan won't be part of Billy Donovan Night. (The Big Picture)

Kevin Kouzmanoff has forearms carved from the finest granite. (The Extrapolater)

Strangely, the same thing happened when Arantxa Sanchez-Vicario took a serve to the crotch. (Lion in Oil)

Not that tennis players are the only ones who have to protect that area. (Foul Balls)

Shawn Kemp and Evander Holyfield we knew about but who could've guessed how much business Willie Anderson is throwing Hallmark's way this weekend. (100% Injury Rate)

Does Michael Vick Know About This?

While we breathlessly await word on any punishment Michael Vick receives for his alleged role in dogfighting at his Atlanta estate our eyes must turn to other examples of athletes involved in dogfighting. Sadly our gaze must extend all the way to Sweden for even European canines are not immune from the sadistic whims of their owners.

Bjorn Borg was severely bitten in the leg by a German shepherd while trying to stop a dogfight and withdrew from his first grass-court match in 26 years.

The five-time Wimbledon champion was bitten in his right leg when he tried to pull the dog, Wolf, away from his golden retriever, Lipton, at his home in Sweden over the weekend.

What kind of name is Lipton for a fighting dog? Unless it means savage or something in Swedish, and according to an online Swedish-English dictionary it doesn't, we're not surprised that he was on the losing end of this encounter. Something for Borg to use the six weeks he'll be off his feet to think about.

Oh, and for those of you in Liverpool who had tickets to watch Borg take on Pat Cash in what we're assuming is a wheelchair tennis match don't go rushing off to get a refund just yet. Richard Krajicek will take Borg's place in the match if not his headbanded spot in our hearts.

You Got Chocolate In My Peanut Butter

Roger Federer has won 48 straight matches on grass courts, including four straight Wimbledons. Rafael Nadal has won 72 straight matches on clay courts and has won the French Open the last two years.  Today one of them is going to begin a winning streak on half-clay, half-grass courts when they lock horns in Nadal's home of Mallorca. A $1.63 million court was built over 19 days to play host to the exhibition match. That's a lot of money to spend on a match that doesn't mean anything but who am I to tell Balearic Islands tourism bureau what to do with their money. After all, 7,000 people will show up to watch the match. That's important on an island that gets millions of people swarming the island each year to sun themselves, party in clubs and ogle topless European women on the beach.

With the welcome departure of Astroturf, there aren't too many other sports where you can do the half field thing so wasted money aside it's cool to have a novelty event like this. I'm not sure I wouldn't have done the halves, vertically, though. Having to be ready to play on both grass and clay during each point would make it more challenging for Federer and Nadal, rather than having two games on each surface and the certainty of bounce and speed that comes with it. Still it's a fun idea and a good way to drum up some interest in tennis between the grand slams. Not that we can watch any of it, of course, but theortetically speaking.