The Feed

And Somewhere A.C. Slater Weeps

Tony Romo + Mr. Belding + Karaoke Metal Band = The reason the internet was invented. I will never, ever, EVER stop believing in the value of the internets.

And we thought Tom Brady banging Gisele made him cool but how many times have he and Mr. Belding sung Journey together? Or Mr. Belvedere for that matter?

(WBRS Sports Blog gets full credit for introducing me to this clip.)

I Don't Know Rascal Flatts But The Eagles Are Still With Us

There's really few things as enjoyable while sitting and waiting for a delivery than Mike Francesa, Mad Dog-less, discussing things having nothing to do with sports. He's deep into a riff about award shows right now, having moved past the Grammys and onto the Oscars.

The most fascinating factoid he's shared thus far is that the Mad Dog, while in college at Rollins, used to babysit for the two Dixie Chicks that are sisters. That's not how he described them - he went with the two tall, thin Dixie Chicks not the short one that's fat. Classy coming from a man of Francesa's girth. If you can identify it, why can't you do anything about it. Their father was a professor at Rollins, it seems, and for one reason or another trusted his kids with that freak.

"I mean Dog's a level-headed guy, but you know he might be watching the sports and let them ruin the house."

Not really what my biggest concern would be if I left my kids at home alone with Chris Russo. Diction lessons would be and I don't mean that in a dirty way at all.

I could really do a transcript of everything, he's that on today but some more choice cuts from the last 15 minutes.

"I'll tell you one thing, though, when you start Red Hot Chili Peppering me, I'm gone. That's an ugly group, I'm telling you right now, that's not a pretty group of guys those Chili Peppers."

Again, if you can identify it...

"I am a music fan, I'm no music expert, I'm no rock historian...If we are going to have a tribute to James Brown, our best choice is Christina Aguilera?"

He's actually right on the money here, although he acts like Brown existed before there was television..."James Brown was big time. Biiiiiig Time!!" The producer wearing a "Khannnnnnnnn!" t-shirt and a nasty ponytail just nods along as he runs through questions about why Dylan and the Eagles weren't on the show. He's just getting started, though.

"Carrie Underwood. All I know about her is she ruined Tony Romo's year. That was the award she got last night, right? Ruining the Cowboys season, Carrie Underwood? Romo's whole year went downhill (big hand gesture here) as soon as she started appearing on the field every week. That was the award last night, wasn't it? Ruining a football season, the winner Carrie Underwood."

He repeated the hand gesture after that, with sound effect of a plane going down. He watched the show before taping "Miked Up" his WNBC Sunday night extravagganza. Something he also does on Oscar night because he doesn't do the show and watches the awards. So, any opinions on the Oscars, Mikey?

"Scorsese's gonna win for The Departed. The Departed's good, it coulda been great, but it's good. Now, I'm not telling Scorsese how to make films."

Please do, Mikey. Please tell all of us how to make movies. He won't go into detail but has a problem with the end of the movie and it's "a little long in spots, but aren't they all." I actually think he's right on the money, here, loving DiCaprio, Baldwin, Marky Mark, etc. I loved the film as well and also wouldn't tell Scorsese how to make films. A few more gems,

"I have never seen a horror movie and I've never seen a spaceship movie in my life."

"I'm a romantic (sucks hard on his cough drop)...E.T.'s not a spaceship movie, it's beautiful. It's a love story."

"He's a weird dude, that Kubrick guy."

He's a treasure. I wasn't watching earlier in the show, thankfully Gerard at Can't Stop The Bleeding was tuned in and caught this remarkable live commercial.

"Valentine’s day is coming….don’t screw it up.”

(long pause)

“Call Vermont Teddy Bear.”

(longer pause)

“I’ve got a cough drop in my mouth.”

(another 7 or 8 seconds of dead air)

“Vermont Teddy Bear…we’ve been working with them a long time.  You can dress ‘em as risque as you want. Send it to her place of work.”

“Back to this Bernie Williams thing…”

There's a really lucky lady out there with a saucily dressed Vermont Teddy Bear headed in her direction as I type. Someday my prince will come...

To The Left, To The Left

Kelefa Sanneh of the New York Times had an interesting article about Beyonce last week in the Arts section. He took a look at her new hit "Irreplaceable" and how it seems to signal a move away from the loving arms of Jay-Z and back to a life without a man to pay her automobills. On the heels of that comes rumor that she may actually have a brand new man in her life, Larry Johnson of the Kansas City Chiefs.

MediaTakeOut.com has obtained recent photographs of Beyonce attending the birthday party of Kansas City Chiefs star running back Larry Johnson (pictured below). While Jay Z accompanied her to the party, our sources say that Beyonce was seen having a long and very intimate conversation with the NFL star.

The Big Lead hopes that LJ is pulling out lines better than, "Hey babe, you know, I play a little football." I hope, for his sake, he knows better than to fuck with the CEO of the Roc's woman unless it's been made quite clear that she's free as a bird.

Sweet Shaun Alexander

Saw this on Deadspin and since I went and clicked on it, I figured you should all be forced to listen to it as well. Continuing in the proud tradition of "The Super Bowl Shuffle." In Birmingham they may love the governor but out in Puget Sound they love them some Shaun Alexander.

Sweet Shaun Alexander

Full lyrics after the jump for those who dare...

U2

I was at the Garden last night to see U2 in their last New York concert of the year. It was my first time seeing them live and, excepting a real downer of a finale, the show was everything I hoped for. Seeing U2 now is something like watching the 1998 Yankees, if you'll forgive the sports analogy. A seasoned and talented team of professionals approaching each night with something to prove, executing each and every play to perfection and giving their fans more than their money's worth each and every time they take the stage. For you, it might be the 72-10 Bulls or the 85 Bears, but whatever picture you draw make it one of a group of men at the absolute pinnacle of their profession. That's what U2 is. I remember the first time I became aware of the band, it was via MTV and the video for "Sunday Bloody Sunday." If you don't remember it, it was the early 80's, a live concert at Red Rocks, the air smoky and the music loud, passionate and in your face. In that guise they remind one of Michigan's Fab Five, going places no one could imagine on the back of raw talent and instinct. Last night was more refined and wholly professional, but like the 98 Yankees, you can never hide the passion and fire that gives birth to performances for the ages.

The show started red hot, grabbing a lively crowd right from the get-go. "City of Blinding Lights" was the first song, followed in short order by "Vertigo" and "Elevation." Bono played the role of general, confidently surveying the surroundings, strutting far and wide to be sure that everyone knew who was in charge of the situation. The Edge was his Sgt. at arms, leading each one of the assaults on the crowd and Adam Clayton and Larry Mullen played the foot soldiers doing the dirty work necessary to vanquish another arena and add yet one more notch to Bono's impressive bedpost. The stage was like a 5th bandmember, its elliptical shape reaching deep into the crowd festooned with video screens, electronic lights and assorted other doodads. Again the Yankee comparison rears it's head, with the non-Bono bandmembers doing the same jobs that Paul O'Neill, Bernie Williams and Tino Martinez used to do, all on a stage that added drama and resonance, just like Yankee Stadium does every time a game is contested within its walls.

The opening trio of songs was followed by "The Electric Co." off of "Boy," the first U2 album all the way back in 1980. It was amazing to think, watching them tear through the song at Madison Square Garden that they had probably first played it in a basement in Dublin. In general it is unthinkable that the rowdy, scruffy group from that "Sunday Bloody Sunday" video is now the slick, massively famous band we see today. Even more incredible is, even with that meteoric rise, the band has been able to keep a link with their fans most similar to Bruce Springsteen. People still see Bono as one of them with a voice, much like Springsteen has kept the blue-collar appeal that he had first starting out. It's most evident during "Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own," when Bono removes his shades to sing the song he wrote about his late father. It is a completely calculated moment, the rock star who is always wearing sunglasses removing them to show his emotional involvement in that particular tune but I'll be damned if it doesn't work in spades. The song is moving and powerful, thanks in no small part to the lack of spectacles on the singer. He hit another strong emotional note during "Pride (In The Name Of Love)" by changing some lyrics to point out that JFK was assassinated on the same date 42 years prior.

The concert rocked on, through "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For," "Beautiful Day," "Bullet the Blue Sky" and others from the most recent album. The highlight for me was when they ripped into "Sunday Bloody Sunday," mixing it halfway through with "Rock The Casbah" before going back into the original tune to close the song out. Believe me when I say even Sharif would have liked it. Along the way Bono hit on everything you'd expect him to; the aforementioned sunglasses removal; telling us America was not a country but an idea which the whole world believes in; and a plea to help Africa. Again, he's a rockstar, but you can't help believing that he is being honest and forthright when he says these things and that ability to connect with people was never more clear to me than last night. The set proper ended with his Africa appeal and, naturally, "One" before the band left to prepare for the encore.

The encore, unfortunately, is where the band ran into a bit of trouble. The trouble didn't start right off the back as they played a stirring "With Or Without You" and brought the house down with a chilling "Stuck In A Moment You Can't Get Out Of." Bono and The Edge performed it as an acoustic duet and the song was lovelier than it's ever sounded to me before, particularly the higher vocals which The Edge sings in a voice you wouldn't imagine coming from a man named The Edge. It was interesting that they dedicated the song to Michael Hutchence, the deceased frontman of INXS who had died on the date 8 years prior. He passed away, of course, due to strangulation caused by a belt around his neck cutting off oxygen while he pleasured himself. It's interesting because the song was "Stuck In A Moment You Can't Get Out Of" which is about as good as it gets for a tabloid headline about Hutchence's death. Beautiful song, maybe a little on the nose for this particular tribute.

All of this was building to what, I think I'm safe in saying, everyone in the arena believed would be a showstopper of an ending. Bono told the crowd that the next song would be a cover of a song by someone synonymous with New York City and when he invited opening act and 70's punker Patti Smith on stage I assumed we were going to hear a Ramones song before a proper U2 sendoff. Instead the band ventured forth with a shaky and surprisingly uncertain cover of John Lennon's "Instant Karma." The shakiness was made worse by a very cracked out looking Patti Smith slurring and mumbling her sections of the song and a fairly uninspired performance from the band itself. Bono eventually helped Smith off the stage, following her down the stairs before, I hoped, returning for the final song of the evening. But the band followed soon after, only to return for 30 or so seconds more, with an even more bewildered looking Smith,  of "Karma" before leaving once again. The crowd was confused, as it felt like a very abrupt ending, chanting "U2, U2" in a dark arena for a few minutes before the house lights came up and we all shuffled home.

I hate to go back to the sports analogy well but the first thing I thought of while leaving was Game 4 of the 2003 World Series. To recap, Joe Torre resisted putting Mariano Rivera in to pitch in a tie game, even as it moved into extra innings. The Yankees eventually lost the game when Jeff Weaver gave up a home run to Alex Gonzalez and Torre rightly took criticism for losing a game without using his best pitcher. Last night U2 did the same thing, they had "40," "Bad," "Running to Stand Still," "I Will Follow" and several others in the bullpen, but instead they turned things over to Jeff Weaver, or Patti Smith in this case,  and left without using all the weapons at their disposal. It was a disappointing ending, as even George Costanza knows that you want to go out on a high note, but not enough to overshadow what was 2+ hours of greatness before that point. 

Making Yom Kippur Hipper

An article from today's Post about the first star of the nascent hip-Chabad movement.

"Onstage, Matisyahu cuts a decidedly original figure, incorporating quotes from the Torah and melodies from Hasidic chants into songs that percolate over a reggae beat, extolling devotion to God while wearing the traditional black suit."

I always thought the one thing the Aleinu needed to really crossover into the pop charts was a reggae beat to percolate over.  There are a lot of things to like about Hasidic rap, for one it's less about the ho's than it is about the charoset. Rather than waving hands without care as in the mainstream music world, hip-Chabad fans daven with profound faith and devotion. I hope you join me in working toward a rap world with the motto - Kol Nidre? Yes! Dr. Dre? No!

Until then I'll be drinkin Cristal at the bris, y'all. Shalom

Hasidic Reggae

Link: New York Post Online Edition: entertainment.